The Bogeyman

It has been one week since I had eye surgery. My recovery has been delightfully easy. No bruising. No swelling. No visible scarring. In fact, at a first glance, you would never know I recently had eye surgery.

This is a blessing I had not expected.

In the past, I have experienced the extreme opposite.

Last Monday, I was filled with fear and dread. I was so afraid even though I have been through this eight times. It has been seven years since my last surgery, and the unknown of each surgery can be daunting.

We decided as a family that Brad should not take off time from our business to drive me to the hospital. It's a blessing having parents live closely, so we can make convenient decisions like this. Mommom took precious care of Cozette. The night before surgery Cozette repeated over and over that she was going to Mommom's the next day to eat birthday cake.  I am not sure where she came up with this.

Papa was my designated driver and caregiver at the hospital. I wish everyone could experience the pleasure of his company. When we arrived at Emory, I filled out the necessary paper work and the receptionist handed my Dad a pager and gave us instructions.

"The first time it vibrates, she averted her eyes towards me, you are to report to the last door on the left.  The second time, means your daughter will be ready for you to come back to visit before surgery, and the third time it vibrates means that she is in recovery and ready to see you."

Dad and I took our seats in the waiting area. We talked about everything. He was in the middle of  telling me that he was going to try and visit my Mom's cousin who was also at Emory when the pager went off.

As I got up to leave, I looked to my Dad for comfort.

"Everything is going to be just fine," he assured me as he rubbed my back.

I was shaking on the inside.

After they prepped me for surgery, it was a relief to see him again. We spoke to the anesthesiologist, and to Dr. Beck. The nurse kept coming in to administer eye drops. Dad was calmly talking to me the entire time. He finally looked at his watch to inform me that there was only about 15 minutes before surgery. This unnerved me so much, that I could no longer hold back my tears.

Dad came to my bedside and patted my arm as I started expressing all of my fears and concerns.  He quietly listened as I cried and rambled. I am not sure why I was so upset. Brad had given me a blessing of healing and comfort. I knew that I was being watched over yet, I was still afraid.

I have reflected on Dad's words of comfort all week.

""  Jeannie, you have angels with you. They are watching over you. I know this to be true. Have faith. Do not fear. What you are feeling is normal and even expected, but do not fear. What you are going through right now is no different than being afraid of the bogeyman in the dark. It is when you turn the lights on you discover there's nothing there to fear. There's nothing to be afraid of. "  

The bogeyman.

I laid in that hospital bed and the thought of the bogeyman struck me funny. I did not laugh though. A certain calmness and peace came over me. I looked up at Dad and told him that his words were exactly what I needed to hear.

I was no longer afraid.

It was a good thing too because within minutes they came to get me.

Not the bogeyman.

The nurses.

It was time for surgery.


I sincerely hope that Brad and I will be able to comfort and bless the lives of our children in their adulthood, as our parents continue to bless ours.